One of my loyal readers writes:
So I think it’s fair to say that [your blogger] is drifting way, way off track in New Zealand and an intervention may be necessary. The evidence is pretty clear.
First, his blog postings are coming at intervals of days, not daily or even hourly like any blogworthy New Zealand trekker (or, to use the local parlance, “Tramper”) would do.
Second, we see video proof that he is being attacked by murderous parrots and is forced to flee for his life whilst muttering incoherently. He seems overcome by parrotnoia.
Third, by his own admission he is stunned by the local visual phenomena, which apparently include painted wooden pallets and piles of rubble.
Fourth, he goes to uninhabited islands looking for extinct ten foot birds.
Finally, he’s so enthralled by local sights and discoveries that he focuses on…shipping containers.
Should we notify the local medical authorities? The constabulary? What is to be done?
Fear not, loyal reader. This blog is in fact staying in the finest accommodations and is well beyond the reach of the parrot menace. And while it’s true that the moa-spotting is not going as well as might be hoped, I am optimistic about my chances here in Wellington. There are numerous side streets, shopping arcades, and alcoves that could easily provide shelter for whole families of moas. Keep watching this blog for moa updates!
Moa Encounter (Artist’s Rendition)